Hey,

I was just wondering whether people could have a look at a film I made at university this year. I know it's not perfect, but as this was the first film I've made, I was wondering whether anyone could have a look at it, and tell me what was good/bad as a reflection on how to improve in any future projects I direct.

The link to the film is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfqBk9jTK-U and I'd really appreciate any feedback, whether you liked or hated it!

Thanks

Just took a quick gander on it.
One thing that really stuck out is screen directions.
There is a few awkward placements such as the first meeting with Den. Both den and dave are on screen right and it leaves alot of "dead space" on the left side.
The placement of actors when switching between the master shot and the close up is also different. In the first confrontation (when they got the pizza) den was on screen right in the 2shot, but on the screen left on the close up.

at 4:34 (is that someone physically blocking the light out?)

the shift to night time can be done with 1 shot and have it stay the entire duration of the 2 shots. it's a little fast and all i could make out was that it was night time.
the following scene, the set up is a little odd. the pseudo OTS MS of the couple has a slight alignment oddity. OTS of the boyfriend has the gf in the middle of the screen, then the flip of it the gf is on the edge of the screen.
5:21 (she says bye twice. I'm not sure if that's on purpose, but it seems a little redundant if it's on purpose)

The editing still needs some tightening up. It looks like it's been working on extensively (which is good) and I think there are just tweaks at this point.
I'm no director, so I don't really have too much to say about acting.
The cinematography is not bad, it just needs to work on composition of the shot (atleast in my opinion. Anyone here is welcome to disagree.)
Sound wise, it seems that you haven't gotten to the sound design stage yet, so I'm assuming alot of these are temp tracks and sound levels will be worked on.
the PD is pretty good. The only thing is the pizza box looks empty, but that's just nit picking

The story itself leaves a little to be desired. I was left with more questions than answers. Who's making the noise, why did he kill the boyfriend, what was he doing that scared the crap out of the boyfriend, what happens after he shuts them in the bathroom and other stuff.

It shows that you have spent alot of time working on it, and all I can say is that it can only get better from here on out. I hope my comments can help out in some way shape or form and hopefully I was giving some constructive criticism.

If you have any questions about my comments, you're welcome to message me or reply back. I'll keep an eye out for the topic.


Mike Vee
Good luck and keep it up!

Hey,
It is really a wonderful film made by you.I really liked it very much.You have made it for the first time so in that accordance it is best.You can be a wonderful film maker.

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